Gaia Community: Meghan's Blog

Words, Words, Words...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Sat, 21 Jun 2008 16:49:00 GMT

I've no words of my own these days...though the titles here speak volumes for me today.

(I did have the most amazing Summer Solstice Ritual last night and this morning - something I will write about when words find their way back)

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Goin' Home

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 22:38:36 GMT

By Jimmy LaFave...

~~~~~~~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Go to sleep, you weary princess, let the miles roll you away
Out to this place on the prairie, where we've reached the end of day
You're going home, close your eyes, you're going home

Don't you worry, i'm right beside you, you can dream a peaceful dream
This road is long, but i don't worry, because you cause my heart to sing
Close your eyes, you're going home, close your eyes

You may wake up and find me, driving with a teardrop in my eye
It's from the happiness inside me, the reason why is you and i

Go to sleep, you precious angel, night has fallen, day is gone
Your brown eyes will sparkle in the sunrise, they will dance beside the dawn
Close your eyes, you're going home, close your eyes

You're going home, close your eyes, you're going home

~~~~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
SeaYA!

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Calling All Angels...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 04:32:40 GMT

By Train...

For Danskin...for my best girlfriends...for my sister, always:

~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~

I need a sign to let me know you're here
All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere
I need to know that things are gonna look up
'Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

When there is no place safe and no safe place to put my head
When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

And I'm calling all angels
I'm calling all you angels

I won't give up if you dont give up
I won't give up if you dont give up
I won't give up if you dont give up
I won't give up if you dont give up

I need a sign to let me know you're here
'Cause my TV set just keeps it all from being clear
I want a reason for the way things have to be
I need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me

IIiiiiii..... I'm calling all angels
And.......I'm calling all you angels

When children have to play inside so they don't disappear
And private eyes solve marriage lies cause we don't talk for years
And football teams are kissing Queens
and losing sight of having dreams
In a world that what we want is only what we want until it's ours

And I'm calling all angels
I'm calling all you angels

And I'm calling all angels
I'm calling all you angels

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Swans at Galway Bay

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 01:24:14 GMT

By Floyd Skloot

Seven pairs of swans preen
this morning near the docks.
We walk down together
searching among the rocks
for a perfect feather
to commemorate the scene.

The swans float, one foot still
tucked underneath a wing,
the other held steady
as a rudder. They seem
both unconcerned and ready
for whatever the day will
bring them as they drift past.

Soon they are swept away
in pairs where the River
Corrib surges into Galway Bay--
from here just a sliver
of jagged slate-blue glass
but fierce enough to spin
them sideways toward the sea.

Paired still, they carry on
their slow ceremonies,
adjusting with utter calm
to the currents they move in,
content, it would appear,
to end up wherever
they find themselves as long
as they are together,
each feather where it belongs,
each mate with a clear
line of sight to the other.

We have come to the docks'
end emptyhanded. I turn
back, but she stops to watch,
holding me there as one
small feather drifts to shore.

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Breath

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Mon, 12 May 2008 01:14:04 GMT

By Floyd Skloot

For depth of breath young Sinatra
like a boxer ran five morning miles.
Solo on the high school track, thin
as the stripe on a lane, he was all
ears, all bone. He was all business.

The first laps were always for love
songs, nice and easy till he found
his rhythm, drawing the urban air
in deep. The moment he became
one with wind, he knew the way
a body held in check could move
exactly like a melody. It was simple
as swimming underwater. His stride
grew smooth, fingers to shoulders
to hips to toes, graceful as a smile
across low notes as the key shifted.

That was for the long lines of lyric
no one else could hold. In time he ran
for the uptempo tunes, let go a little
to get the torso involved and bring
his thin arms into play, his gait all glissando.
Step by step he swelled from the inside
out, making himself strong enough
for song. He ran past pain, timed by
the beat of his heart because song
was not about how fast but how long.
This was his Golden Age, Jersey City
in the early Thirties, his moment to make
dreams come true. Music was in the air.
He knew he could go on like that forever
because his dream began with breath.

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Prayer for You...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Tue, 06 May 2008 13:30:46 GMT

From Jimmy LaFave...one of MyFave...

Don't you cry, baby
Don't you weep
You know still waters
Can run so deep
You can be a lighthouse, baby
Or a stormy sea
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me

With good intentions
And well worn lines
Baby, I've sang my freedom
Time after time
You can't put rhyme or a reason
To our destiny
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me

Then we could fly
We could fly above the pain
And we could make every morning
New again,
Me and you again

Girl you walk so softly
With a heavy, heavy heart
Your dreams aren't over
Don't let them fall apart
You will find perfection
And harmony
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me

For I have been forsaken
By the highway's call
And you've been truly blessed
By the one and all
But casting of stones
Will never set you free
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me

Then we could fly
We could fly above the pain
We could wake in the morning
Make it new again
Me and you again

Don't you cry
No, don't you weep
You know still waters
Can run so deep
I can be your lighthouse, baby
Or your stormy sea
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me
I'll say a prayer for you
Could you say a prayer for me

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Aaaaoooouuuuccchhhhh!!!

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Sun, 06 Apr 2008 15:29:24 GMT

Life has a way of gently nudging you back to reality...sometimes well, not so gently if you're not paying enough attention to it's more subtle signs...That was me this weekend, receiving a "not so gentle" reminder to pay attention to where I'm going instead of keeping my head in the clouds. "Oooh, look, a butterfly" ...trip, skid, topple, slide...aaaoooouuuucchhhh! Stop, dust settles, check to see if I've broken anything. Nope, but I feel stinging...everywhere! I'm covered in dust and gravel from the Town Lake trail and I must have been going at a pretty good clip, because I was sliding for what seemed like an eternity. It's amazing how when something like this happens, time slows to an almost standstill...it's because the focus is SO clear...in THIS MOMENT ONLY, that in that moment, time doesn't exist. I've noticed this over the course of particular events...and like some baseball player sliding into home, this nano-second lasted an eternity. But when the dust settled, and time resumed, I checked for blood, broken bones and dusted myself off and resumed my run. I was only 3/4 mile into my 3 miles, so I still had a way to go...and this fall, this jolt back to reality gave me something to contemplate on the remaining path...It's interesting how sometimes I get so caught up in the abstract to the exclusion of paying attention to my current path. I'm finding that in my life now and perhaps that's why the little wake up call. "Pay Attention" "Watch where you're going" Of course, I have to say, I'm grateful for this little scrape...as the "nudge" life gave me could have been much more severe. I'm very fortunate in my health, my life in general and am very grateful that the worst thing in my life right now is something a little bandage and my kickass immune system can fix. And I heed the nudge...and thank my life for the awareness.

I debated adding this snap, but find the blood fascinating and wanted to remember this event. Evidence of LIFE, fragile, pure, miraculous as it streams down like tears, like water...LIFE...this instance, presenting it's underbelly, then within days, the wound will heal, and a rebirth of skin will take it's place. This wound, this scar will forever be an experience unique to me, and fleeting. What a cool concept!

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Aftermath and other odd calculations

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 14:42:42 GMT

It's a quiet morning at the office, 'cept for the birds and the wind rustling through the trees, and I have to say, I'm kinda grateful for the quiet after the last week. Crazy week! Crazy busy! But somehow we got it all done and now as I look around at the aftermath - like a tornado, I have to smile and remind myself of how typical we are for a small business ---and we're still alive and kickin' so there are no complaints, really, worth any merit!

Another realization this week is that we have now officially moved from "starve-up" to growth phase of our business. Yeah, we still live hand to mouth and cash flow continues to be the real challenge (again, very typical), but I see the majority of our challenges change now - we've traded in our old woes and worries for newer ones. Things like processes, communications, forecasts, and dare I say it...meetings! Yikes! Yeah, I'll have to dust off all my managment/leadership/teamwork training and plan this next phase of our growth.

I love what I do, and this business has my heart and soul entwined in it...and quite literally, my blood, sweat and tears...but I know...truly know that this next phase will be the hardest for me personally ---and my greatest fear is that it will ask me to make a choice that I'm not sure how to make. I read recently, that when asked to choose between two things, a child of nine said, "I choose both" ---when confronted that that is not the choice presented, he replied, "Why Not? You've obviously forgotten the meaning of the word." So yes. My choice? Both, naturally. Why Not? Whose rules are they anyway? I choose both. :)

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Random Mutations from the Fringe

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 14:19:43 GMT

It's a quiet morning...but the sun, she is smiling down on the office futon and the birds outside are starting their day. It's a great day to be alive, to be healthy, to BE.

I'm back in the office ---living the life of a nomad and realizing my life is rather "fringe" compared to most of the folks I know. I spent the weekend with my sister and her family before heading back to Austin. I simply had to laugh out loud Saturday morning, at the absurdity of my life compared to my sisters. My sister: married, two kids, house in a cul-de-sac in a neighborhood where all the houses blend and neatly kept yards with all the neighborhood kids playing after school in a very very safe neighborhood. I opened the door to the sunny morning street scene to see two of her next door neighbors mowing and sweeping their meticulous yards and sidewalks. I literally felt like I was in Pleasantville or stepped into the set of the Truman show. I so SO SO don't fit into that scene...though I love visiting my sister and spending time with my nieces, I know it's a life path that I will not follow. I'll eventually settle down again, but right now, this is where my path leads me and I've never been a "little pink house with a picket fence" type anyway. My tapestry isn't woven for that and it did take me years to figure that out and sometimes I still wonder if it's merely a choice. I would presume that it is always a choice ...or at least I used to think so until I read about Benjamin Libet's discovery that the neurons in our brain actually begin reacting BEFORE our mind engages...so the whole "free will" concept is now called into question.

Next week I head to Seattle for a few days...and the next month will be spent mostly on the road, in the air and with customers of varying kind. I do enjoy that, but life right now is a whirlwind and I do feel the need to have some quiet time. I think that's why I enjoy the office at this point ---I have a couple of hours of sheer solitude until the folks start meandering in and the phones begin to ring and chaos that is the day begins. Running in the morning used to give me that...and when I actually LIVED in my house, I had my morning time with the backyard wildlife. I do miss that. I simply need to find a routine amidst the chaos. Maybe a morning meditation would help, though when I'm in San Diego, I begin work as soon as I get up, so I end up working even more. Not really a healthy way to live.

In chaos, there is order...I only need to look at things from a different perspective to see what pattern I've created and find peace in that.

Well, the phones have begun...so much for solitude for this day...

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Breathe like an Elephant...in water?

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 19:56:24 GMT

Bring me to Life...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

how can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where I've become so numb without a soul

my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
until you find it there and lead it back home

Wake me up inside
call my name and save me from the dark
bid my blood to run
before I come undone
save me from the nothing I've become

now that I know what I'm without
you can't just leave me
breathe into me and make me real
bring me to life

frozen inside without your touch

without your love darling only you are the life among the dead

all this time I can't believe I couldn't see
kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything
without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more
bring me to life

~~~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first time I heard this song, it was attached to a sailing video ( Moth Sailing ---seriously kickass cool). ...but the song actually has a Spiritual Connection for me...and to this day, when I hear this, it's completely Spiritual in meaning for me...and makes me feel warm, energized and connected.

I'm reading a new book "Think of an Elephant" by Paul Bailey---and of all the many many books I've read over the years, this one...is like the words have been written to punctuate my thoughts...as disjointed as they may be...surreal.

I'll write more later, I've just gotten back from a whirlwind tour of Florida ---and a variety of stories among them - but getting up at 3:30 this morning to catch my flight has left me less than functional ---so I'm due for a nap and I'm compelled to paint. I feel it building deep within, and I've learned to recognize the futility in supressing it's expression. I actually stopped by the art supply store to pick up a couple of things...when inspiration wells inside, it's not easily repressed ...and I simply go with the flow as the energy directs me. (ironically, the book talks about this too----so SO me)

This week in Austin, next in Seattle, then back to Ft Lauderdale/Miami and possibly a jaunt to the Bahamas...my home is within now...everywhere and nowhere - everything and nothing.

I am water today. Fluid. But my body is tired, mortal, still learning to swim in ambiguity...and sans coffee...in need of some divine breath.

Breathe in to me....please.

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Russian Dolls of Reality

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 01:54:19 GMT

There's a quickening in the air...more so than merely my life speeding by me, fingernails clinging to any similance of normality...it's more than that, much more. I see connections, synchronicities, a patchwork path that simply seems surreal...so surreal that I wonder if I've lost all sensibilities or am I simply aware of Maya....and lucid dreaming in the dreaming state creates a different reality than I've ever imagined.

I woke up this morning to the sound of the usual song birds, and my quiet crying which is highly unusual. It was one of those nano-moments when the crossover between the dreamworld and "reality" is not really defined and my "dream state" was very very real. As I lay there, thinking about the dream, I wondered which was really the dream or am I merely a dreamer in a nested dream....and how many nests are there to reality. 2000 bits...out of 4 billion. That's a lot of Russian Dolls of Reality....and what's at the center? "me?" And what, pray tell, is that?

Perhaps, merely a kernal of a song...a note, single, pure...waiting to join the symphony and become the passion of the maestro's masterpiece to the Universe.

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Small Business is like this...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Tue, 11 Dec 2007 11:43:46 GMT

It's 3:00 am...and I'm awake. Why? I'm not really sure, but I think my heart has something to say, so it's taking my body out of bed for a bit and I'll simply let it lead me where it will...

The city is quiet now...with only the occasional street noise wafting up through my window. It sounds like it could be raining as the street noise is "slushy" - I'll check later.

So why am I awake? I'm thinking about shingles...and torn tendons and broken legs and...and...and "what ifs"...The "what ifs" that keep a lot of small business folks up at night, I'm sure. I know I'm pretty typical when it comes to starting a business...all the little things that keep us up at night. A couple of conversations I had over the last few days has started this avalanche of "what ifs"...mainly about health care....and lack of it. One of our employees is a single mother of one very bright and talented little 9 year old, who just last week was diagnosed with shingles...I always thought that was "an old persons disease" ---and I guess that it's much more prominent in someone much older, but it seems to be brought on by chicken pox and stress as well...and though rare, can be seen in someone as young as 9. Of course we don't offer health insurance for the company---just can't afford it...hell, I haven't had health insurance since I started OGM 5 years ago. Of course, I consider myself very fortunate to have a kickass immune system and have always been healthy so far...and I'm all about preventative measures rather then reactive consequences...but still, I know that if something were to happen to me...the company wouldn't make it at this fragile stage...and then there's the responsibility of our employees and their families who depend on us to survive. Sometimes, I swear, given the odds against the survival of small businesses, I wonder how any of us get to be the size of IBM, of Dell, of Ford...I mean, taxes are a bitch, our profits are squeezed from all sides, the government gives us little guys NO breaks that I've seen - EVERYTHING I have is in this business...and we survive by shear will and our customers...that is, of those who survive. We've just passed our 5 year anniversary, and even in a very down year for our industry, we still managed to grow a nice healthy percentage and our prospects are brighter than ever before...so why am I up at 3:00 am?

It's probably this picture that keeps coming to mind as I lay awake these last hours...I think it quite adequately represents what it feels like to run a small business in this environment. I actually took this snap a couple of weeks ago, as I was driving from San Diego up to Seattle for a boatshow. I decided to get off the 5 for a bit to see a little more scenery...and it was amazingly wonderful to get off the drudgery of the interstate. The road was winding, hilly, filled with new sights around every turn...*I'm starting to see the similarities of this drive and entrepreneurship here*...So I was careening along on this drive (me, the jeep, my demo boat with our LED lights, and Navees, my navigating fish)...and a map of the US for the macro view of where I'm headed...and my instincts...and some divine energy. There we were, all jeepin through the mountains on 36 from Red Bluffs toward Eureka...enjoying this amazing ride. Then I decided to stop for gas at this tiny little place with one old REALLY OLD gas pump. I could only afford $10 since that's all the cash I had and they didn't take credit cards. It gave me 1/2 tank, and the lady said it's about a 2 hour drive to the coast, so I felt sure I was good to go...off we went. Further and further up into the mountains we jeeped...the road got progressively curvy, steep and picturesque. The old growth trees were majestic along the cliffs and boulders and valleys so green, the earth so rich and dark...the colors so vibrant it took my breath away. Of course, it was also late afternoon and the sunlight was astounding. But then the weather started to change, the fog rolled in, the rains began, the cliffs below seemed to fill in with nothingness, showing only the tips of trees once towering high overhead. The road was still windy, but now the scene had a little more tension attached to it...the stakes were higher, I had more to lose if I didn't choose well, didn't make the right turns, didn't anticipate what lay ahead.

That's when I really noticed the lack of guardrails...NO GUARDRAILS on a mountain top. Yeah, I know...if I'm going over, odds are a little bit of aluminum banding isn't going to stop me from freefalling to form a little red jeep smudge at the bottom, but I think at that point, it was the mental safety net that I needed. As the sun began to set, the weather worsen, the road get progressively more windy and slippery (think PeeWee Herman's Large Marge scene here)...the fear began to creep in with the fog. But ironically, at the very same time as I was gripping the steering wheel hoping I would stay on the road for the next winding turn and not meet another truck head on, I noticed how ABSOLUTELY AMAZING THIS SCENE WAS BEFORE ME!! Here I was in totally uncharted territory (for me), tears of fear streaming down my cheeks, and being in absolute AWE of this place and my time in it. I can't fully describe the full sensation of all the raw emotions at the top of this mountain...but the picture above may give a glimpse of the moment as I found my shear strength of will to keep going...I realized then that there was no turning back...I could only make my way forward to whatever conclusion there was. I had to keep focused, and simply take it slowly, feel the road, and make my way on.

I'll have to finish this later...but yeah, this is what my heart is telling me...showing me the parallels of running a small business to driving through the mountain's passages in a foggy, rainy unpredictable and sometimes hazardous path...and yeah, it is raining outside in this early morning's city nightscape. How appropos.

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Look at this photograph...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 22:44:10 GMT

This is where I grew up...I am the fat little micheline baby...my sister on the right...is dead, two days (or maybe a week---I can't remember anymore) before Katrina...it's all a blur as I was with her when her heart simply...stopped. and i watched her transition... and she moved to another dimension...someplace I have yet to travel...but eventually will - as we all will. The "mom" in the middle of us decided to skip her funeral...even after I offered to pay for her coming. so I made all her arrangements...and said my "goodbyes" as a representative of "her" family...I miss her -every second of every day... she was my family...and I know I was hers.

It broke my heart...not for me...for my sister...all she ever wanted in life was her love...all she ever wanted..

My other sister who's not in this picture...gave birth to an amazing baby one week after our sister's death...natures's flow of equalibrium...I love that.

Of course I couldn't tell her of our sister's death...the cost would be too much...and I take full reponsibility for this...the most painful thing I've ever experienced...but after seeing Ashley (my niece) one week later...I have no regrets...the most painful...and the most amazing week...LIFE and DEATH in it's yin/yang dance....and I merely a spectator. I am in awe and humility of LIFE.

Gabi? My sister...I miss her...still. But I see her every day...in the butterflies, in the sway of the trees, in the slow dance of Mother Ocean's waves...in the smile and bright blue eyes of my newest niece...I see her...Gabi, you are always with me...and I thank you for your gift...every day...you are my hero! How can I ever thank you for your gift to me....I miss you sister. I miss you!

I have the photo album spread out on my bedroom (ok, it's a loft, the whole place is a bedrooom flooor)... floor..it's time to say it...time to say it...GOODBYE...Goodbye...

I'm listening to Nickleback this rainy Sunday morning...and feeling somewhat nostalgic.

Though truth be told, past memories aren't always pleasant strolls down the memory lane of my past. I, by no means, hailed from the typical Normal Rockwell family. But I do think the holidays (for whatever reason) bring out the melancholy of yesteryear for me...so here I am, indulging in an afternoon - burning Nag Champa and a candle, listening to Nickleback (among others), and flipping through some old photographs ...and through a rainy afternoon of memories - some sweet, some bitter, some better forgotten - but I don't make my life's focus about dwelling in my past, only remembering where my travels have brought me...to here, to now...and that's pretty darn good, so every once in a blue moon, it's good to remember that all the experiences I've had along my way, are what made way to who I am NOW....experiences, good and bad, filled with laughter, tears, serenity and terror...but all shadows and light of who I am...and that I do cherish...everyday.

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The Rainbow Connection...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 16:38:44 GMT

Can the key to the Universe possibly come from the song of a little green frog made of felt that I loved in my youth? ...is this song my 'rosebud'?

RAINBOW CONNECTION
Kermit the Frog

Why are there so many
Songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side
Rainbow's are visions
They're only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we've been told and some chose to
Believe it
But I know they're wrong wait and see

Someday we'll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

Who said that every wish
Would be heard and answered
When wished on the morning star
Somebody thought of that
And someone believed it
And look what it's done so far
What's so amazing
That keeps us star gazing
What so we think we might see

Someday we'll find it
That Rainbow Connection
The lovers the dreamers and me

Have you been half asleep
And have you heard voices
I've heard them calling my name
Are these the sweet sounds that called
The young sailors
I think they're one and the same
I've heard it too many times to ignore it
There's something that I'm supposed to be

Someday we'll find it
The Rainbow Connection
The lovers, the dreamers and me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_/) ~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up this morning with this song in my head, loud, clear, resonating a secret truth yet to be revealed. Ordinarily, this would "just be a song worm" but for the last few days - weeks - years, it now all takes on a deeper meaning for me.

Saturday, I went biking on the Strand in "iffy weather" ---Iffy being a relative term for San Diego. It had rained the day before and was threatening to do so again, but we decided to chance it anyway. It was a great ride and we did get some drenching rain (again, relative)...but then the most amazing thing...a RAINBOW...No, Make that TWO RAINBOWS....No Again...THREE RAINBOWS appeared over the marshlands between us and downtown. I've not ever seen three rainbows at the same time and apparently it's pretty rare for SD as well, but there they were....SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL, VIBRANT...and each color pronounced as if to say, "We are ALL here"...ALWAYS.

The next morning, I woke with the thought of rainbows stirring me. It was that peaceful waking from a sleep that somehow makes me feel I've been to places unknown, untouched, unseen in my waking "reality" ---and I lay in bed, thinking about rainbows and how they're made, why we see them, what they're composed of...and when I got up, even before coffee, I feverishly started looking up rainbows, light spectrum, light waves...yada, yada, yada ---and so my scientific geeky side began to awake---to more energy harnessing, alternative energy, solar microbes, solar dna-enhanced viruses, lasers, electromagnetic energy fields, what role water plays, could play, different frequencies of light - gamma rays, x-rays, UV, RAINBOWS, yada, yada, yada...and then I started my "reality day" and put these interesting topics aside to ripen within...slowly fermenting like fine wine.

...and then this morning, I woke up to Kermit's song and as I lay in bed trying to remember more of the words...I realized a connection, possibly THE connection I've been wondering about. Crudely and naively put: Energy as seen through water = LIFE as we see it in our reality, however we can only see/experience a very specific frequency of the overall light ---based on our limited view...Some of us can only see one fraction of one piece of one band of a rainbow...and our spiritual quest is to first see all the colors of the rainbow, then migrate our way to see the rainbow's full arch...is this enlightenment? ...but we will, inherently based on our human limitations, NEVER be able to experience LIGHT until after we die.

I keep coming back to something I read that "we receive 4 billion bits of information a second, but only process 2000 bits" ---that's a lot of lost information bouncing around out there...and maybe the unifying theory of quantum physics is water (or some metaphor of it)...through which based on how and where and when we observe an event, determines what kind of reality rainbow we see ---but truth is actually that beam of light ---our reality is only our perception of a particular spectrum of the prism of water that is our body.

Then again, who knows, I may simply be delusional before coffee...such is the case with an addiction to caffeine, I assume :) Withdrawals can lead to hallucinations, or worse, musings.

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Flights of fancy...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 00:39:30 GMT

I heard the familiar sound of the songbirds outside my office today...and it reminded me of how peacefully close to nature this place is - or seems to be. Yesterday late afternoon, as I was working away with the bay door open, I saw him...the familar roadrunner that plays, hunts, sleeps and frolicks around the building. Sometimes there are more, and most days I see them, they are in the front area, close to the front doorstep ---or even on my Jeep.

Too cool!

So it isn't any wonder that my musing tonight is of the feathered variety...birds have always been fascinating to me...and there are some like the eagle and the hawk, that hold a special place in my life. So...tonight I realized how similar life in general seems to be...to flying. How the act of flight itself is nothing more than a fluctuation of soaring on the wind, and falling - bullet-like, toward the inevitable...but both acts together ---propels us forward toward our destination, our longing, our journey. It's so easy to get caught up in the fear of the downward swoop - when our wings are folded close to us in fear, in protection...it seems natural to do this, but it's only if we let go - open our wings - spread wide and vulnerably embrace the wind, will we find that we can truly FLY....

...and Oh, the things we can see through the eyes of the bird in flight, dancing on the wind, feeling suspended between the world - and the sky. Imagine it...and feel the wind on your feathers.

Uh, and yeah, don't get me started on Eagle sex....I'm definitely coming back as an Eagle - just for the fun of it!

:)

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Like a Smooth Stretch of Highway...Let er Roll!

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 02:55:55 GMT

Sometimes things simply fall into place and my life glides on just as it has meant to be...destiny's proving ground. I always know I'm on the right path when amazing things just "seem to click" ---and right now, there is no doubt:

I am where I should be - doing what is meant for me.

And life, she is good.

I'll be heading back out on that "smooth stretch of highway" in the next couple of weeks, back to San Diego for a few, then up to Seattle.

I'm listening to KPIG radio right now...and interestingly, the song that just came on? "I'm a wanderer" by Dion. Appropos? Too Funny!

Some amazing synchronicities this last week...things that if I knew how to calculate the odds, would surely prove some amazing coincidences. I love the way the Universe works it's magic...and watching it unfold day to day - moment to moment.

Makes LIFE interesting....and anticipation of what is just around the corner, the next song, the next chance meeting...

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Cicada Song...sharing Water, singing for LIFE

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 00:27:58 GMT

OK, neither of these are cicadas...one, a grasshopper with the upper hand/leg, and the other a walking stick, looking for a drink...or a meal :)

Such is nature. Such was my weekend at the ranch. The weekend's lesson: Longhorn husbandry...the miracle of life, the drive of motherhood...the stronger drive of sex. Nature, along the river at Tarcoola Ranch among my dearest friends, the girls (photos to be added), and the only place left in Austin that remotely feels like Home (besides my very bohemian office where I'm currently living for a bit)... I'll have to finish this later...as there's a cicada singing at my door...and the evening is calling me...

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Thoughts before coffee...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 15:02:17 GMT

"Mass and energy are both but different manifestations of the same thing - a somewhat unfamiliar conception for the average mind."

~~ Albert Einstein

Einstein. One of my favorite bohemians...quirky, brilliant, funny, real. I like reading his letters to friends and family and his interaction with children as much as his theories of the universe, his philosophies, his thoughts on religion. He's a fellow, i would have liked to meet in my lifetime (or in his).

Energy. LIFE. LOVE and all aspects of e-MOTIONs...I read recently that there is a new experimental technology that will use human's footfalls to power "the grid" --it's to be used in high traffic areas like train/subway stations and other high volume places. What a cool concept!!! I wonder if you can also use this same technology in our roadways (or on our car tires) so that all of us who drive incessantly will actually "give back" ...wouldn't that be cool if our act of driving can power either our own vehicle (object in motion stays in motion), or somehow give energy back to the whole. Hmmmm...thoughts to ponder in the wee hours of the morning when the energy of life vibrates with the imagination of E.

Recycling Energy....

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Of Hawks and Eagles...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Wed, 03 Oct 2007 02:53:39 GMT

I had this dream the night before I left San Diego for Austin that I'm still trying to figure out the meaning...It was simple enough...an amazing white hawk that was full winged spread flying facing me so that I can see its underside. I had never seen a white hawk before, but knew it was a hawk by its shape and its tail feathers were spread and I noticed a band of brown about an inch up from the tip all the way across the tail. It flew toward me, then turned and landed on a barren smooth barked multi-branched tree that shone like gold in the sunlight. The hawk and the tree were the only things in the dream ---and the sequence was only that ...the hawk landed in the tree and it was the most amazing site...and then I woke up (I think it was the earthquake that woke me)

...so tonight I'm in Austin and I still have quite a bit to write about outside of this, but wanted to get this down before it gets lost in the daily shuffle of things...I ended up seeing several Hawks on my trip to Austin....some flying, some perched on a post. I think it was either three or four total during the trip. Pretty cool as Hawks AND EAGLES have always been present in my world. Some of the Eagles I've experienced have been pretty amazing like the one on the beach in St Pete, or the one at my friends ranch in Bastrop - where they've not seen one before or since. But regardless, tonight I was searching the meaning of white hawks in dreams and found out THEY EXIST!!! There is actually a hawk that is a white hawk...and it looks just like the one I dreamt about.

Pretty cool dream...even if I have no clue where it came from of what it could mean. It was beautiful and serene...

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High Mileage - time for a tune-up...

http://revesocean.gaia.com — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 23:59:25 GMT

I feel like I am at some profound crossroads here –paths that await me – but they seem to diverge from one another…or do they? I’m still unsure what, or why, or how – only IS. The more I read about religion, about science, about myself, the less I really REALLY know ANYTHING for certain. Even my emotions carry a hormone-biased tone. Is my bohemian lifestyle finally taking its toll? ---Vibrations! Vibrations are still the only constant in all my reading, my limited understanding ---Harmonics, waves, frequency ---and dreams, thoughts, stillness. It’s that vibration that I feel from Mother Nature. It’s no wonder I cycle with the moon and feel the little earthquakes, but I’m not that sensitive – I’m really rather dense on so many levels, so maybe it’s simply a question of imagination run amok!

Might be time for a glass of wine…

…and ponder the Nature of things.

…and chance meetings…like Val, my artist neighbor who invited me to a Buddhist temple later this week.

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